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Welcome to The Comrade, the website of the Communist Party of Lovia!
LCP (NM) logo
Welcome dear comrade! This is the official website of the Communist Party of Lovia. The party uses this website to give her view on the news and to explain and propagate her ideas. Interested? Then have a look at 'The Critical Side'. The site is moderated by Chairman Meow, who occasionally leaves fun stuff like comics, songs and reviews of movies and books at 'The Fun Side'. Be sure to watch out as this site develops!
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The Critical Side
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The Fun Side
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News (the archive)

January 15 2011 - NORTH KOREA IS HOLIDAY DESTINATION #1
So says the magazine that accompanies the Belgian newspaper De Morgen every weekend. The redaction put together a series of articles on trends in 2011 traveling destinations. DM Magazine, the name of the magazine the articles appeared in, dubbed North Korea as 'the strangest country to travel to'. They estimated that every year about 2000 people visit the country and also pointed out the surprising accessibility of the country. The latter is indeed remarkable since North Korea is pretty much an impenetrable fortress, constantly under marshal law and with strict control on foreign media. The communist regime even goes as far as providing every tourist with an own guide that constantly spawns propaganda. It depends on what you expect of a holiday but if a unique open-air museum sounds like fun to you, then give it a try. If you say something nice about their leader they even give you a ticket for a mass propaganda spectacle (I'm dead serious!). North Korea however wasn't the only communist country in the top trends, Cuba is also a rising star. Perhaps more fit for a beach holiday and a little closer to home too. You will have to miss the funny guide though.

May 31 2010 - THE RAPE OF COLLECTIVE SAFETY
Today a convoy of six ships with help for the people in Gaza was violently intercepted by the Israeli navy. The government of Israel violates the rights of Palestinians for decades now and the entire conflict is based on nothing but a simple religious antagonism. The discrimination and violence that the Palestinians have to suffer shows resemblances to the Apartheid system that existed in South Africa from 1948 to 1994. And what did the west do? Sure, we made some declarations and we encouraged talks but the people in Gaza can't do nothing with our beautiful words. The UN didn't react when Israel violated its resolutions because Israel was a strategic partner of the United States. Collective safety got raped once more.

Though since Obama came to power the US dared to criticize the 'colonial' efforts of Israel to invade Palestinian territory, we still have to wait on real action. International organizations have asked multiple times for economic or diplomatic sanctions but somehow that only works for countries like Iran and North Korea. Not that we wish to defend the later ones, we just ask for the logic in this discrimination? If it is selfishness of the western countries than we should at least have the courage to face that!

Viewpoints

CPL.nm membership card

The CPL.nm defends the integrity of the civil freedoms but also wants more attention and financial support for social issues. According to the party, discrimination should be regarded as a crime. Nonetheless it defends progressive values and is tolerant towards the legalization of abortion and gay rights. The party also defends a strong social security and accessible education and healthcare, wants to raise spending on education and cultural subsidies and considers a non-commercial broadcasting system as a possible tool for the education of society as a whole.

Economically it wants to find a balance between growth and social justice and defies the neoliberal market dogma. Social security and progressive taxation must be maintained and large capitals need to be taxed at a high rate. The CPL.nm seeks to use nationalized industry and a state bank as tools to guide the economy and financial markets. It also wishes to stimulate consumption of ecological and local products by taxing the import of foreign products. The line of government control is in the party program extended to the environmental issues as the party wants more government involvement in crucial sectors like transportation and energy. It considers quota on fishing and farming as good measures to protect society from high prices and ecological disasters.

The CPL.nm wants to establish a system of democratic socialism and give as much power to the Congress and the people as possible. In foreign politics they want to see a just and consequent Lovia and support for conflict regions.

Comrade Kitten
Chairman Meow
Chairman Meow is the host of this website and he is responsible for everything that appears in The Fun Side. Comrade Meow is a real hard-line commie that will address everyone like comrade, even those we don't have communist sympathies. From when he was a little kitten, comrade Meow wanted to lead his own communist republic. All he got was this lousy site but he sure runs it with discipline. Don't offend him or you will have to criticize yourself in public! Any resemblance between this furry comrade and certain historic figures who think that it is funny to walk a thousand miles is pure coincidence.


Fun stuff
COMMUNIST JOKE
Boris, an abiding Soviet citizen, saves up his rubles to buy the Lada of his dreams. After he pays his money, he is told he will have his car in eight years.
"Eight years?" he asks "And do you know what month?"
"August"
"August? What day in August?" He asks
"The Second of August" is the reply
"Morning or Afternoon?"
"Afternoon. Why do you need to know?"
"The plumber is coming in the morning."

A COMRADE CRUSADING
Comrade Meow doesn't mind debating our ideologic opponents. He is a true orator and succeeds in his mission every time. Liberals beware, for your capitalist logic wont resist!
An excerpt of his latest discussion:

Liberal spokesman: You are entitled to have your own opinion on any matter.
Chairman Meow: And you would have to respect it even if you don't agree?
Liberal spokesman: Of course, that's part of the liberal way.
Chairman Meow: Then it is my opinion I'm not entitled to have an opinion of my own.
Liberal spokesman: ?!

If you want Comrade Meow to debate at your high school, television show or bachelor party just leave a request on the talk page. We'd be happy to take down liberals, conservatives and extreme-rightists. We are not responsible for possible cat fights and don't do refunding (that's for pussies).

ASK THE COMRADE
He's no Doctor Phil but he'll be happy to help you out nonetheless! For all issues, from an existential crisis to that wonderful recipe of your grannies apple cake, the comrade is there. If you need the wisdom of Chairman Meow or want to thank him for indoctrinating your children you can leave a comment here.

  • Your question/comment for Chairman Meow
  • Your question/comment for Chairman Meow

Comrade Meow is thankful for your attention and will answer as soon as possible. Maybe he will even push its head. Remember to start your questions/remarks with 'Dear Comrade'!

INDOCTRINATION CAN BE FUN!
Who ever said communism lead to a major setback of culture? Socialist realism looks very nice in the living room! Enough silliness. I, Chairman Meow, have dug into my record archive and found some nice songs that can be tied to socialist ideas. Sometimes it's only a reference to social injustice, sometimes it's plain communist propaganda. Lay back and enjoy while you are being indoctrinated in a fun way!

  1. Imagine - John Lennon : still the absolute number one!
  2. Working Class Hero - Greenday : I know it's a cover, but it sounds better
  3. The International - Tony Babino : a re-style of the classic one
  4. Society - Eddie Vedder : about retreating from a society that has gone made
  5. The Color Of Money - Hollywood Beyond : very underestimated!
  6. Keep On Rocking In The Free World - Neil Young : Is it me or is he being cynical?
  7. Californication - Red Hot Chili Peppers : about side effects of western culture
  8. Talkin' About A Revolution - Tracy Chapman : like it says, about revolution
  9. The Model - Kraftwerk : weird but lovely at the same time
  10. Big Yellow Taxi - Counting Crows : listen close, this isn't just a love song
  11. Do They Know It's Christmas - Band Aid : enjoy your next capitalist holiday!
  12. Back In The USSR - The Beatles : Moscow girls make me sing and shout!
  13. Fool's Day - Blur : only one commie phrase, but a darn good one
  14. Working On A Dream - Bruce Springsteen : he uses a hammer to do this
  15. 500 Miles - The Proclaimers : For when you have to walk really, really far

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